Sibling Rivalry - what's normal and what isn't?
When to Seek Help
A little squabbling between siblings — brothers and/or sisters — is normal – and in most cases, unavoidable! It is part of human nature to want to compete for precious resources- such as our parents’ love and affection. Furthermore, sibling rivalry is not necessarily a bad thing. Children who learn to deal with disagreement and jealousy within a loving family may be better able to resolve conflict in the real world as grown-ups.
On the other hand, strong sibling rivalry that does not resolve by itself over time can become a serious issue that may lead to behavioral or mental health problems in children and young people, if left unchecked.
![Picture of annoyed young girl trying to take an item from older sibling.](/static/media/Sibling-Rivalry-when-to-seek-help.f6df80e5.jpg)
How to decide when too far is too far?
If the issue seems to have become chronic (long-standing, stagnant or recurring) and it is not improving – or perhaps it is worsening with the passing of time – this may be a strong indication that professional help or advice is needed.
Another way to help decide whether you should seek professional help is to consider – is the sibling rivalry affecting one or more children in a negative way? Is it making it hard for them to do everyday things like study and function at home? Does it cause them (or you) significant stress on a daily or semi-daily basis? Is there a risk of serious physical injury or harm occurring to one of your children due to size difference – for example, in the case of a 5-year old fighting with a 2 -year old?
If you answered ’yes’ to any of the above questions, you may want to consider seeking professional help with a specialist child/adolescent counsellor.
Read about what distinguishes someone as a child therapist compared to a regular therapist in the FAQ section.